Quote of the day.
“If you want to make a difference in the world it means you have to be different from the world you see.”
– Hatebreed
Tag: #bekind
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How good are you at keeping secrets?
I can’t make a general statement about this because I am certainly not omniscient, and I don’t know what I don’t know. But.
I do know that there are people who love to gossip. Who can’t wait to share whatever interesting tid bit they found out, even if it’s not the whole story, and perhaps not even true. I also know that there are people who like to share all the details of their life, sometimes without regard for the interest of the audience in those details.
I heard a saying once, “Three can keep a secret if two of them are dead.”
The point is, if someone tells you anything overly personal or confidential in any way, and especially if they flat out tell you that it’s not public info or that they’ve told no one else, or very few people, you have an obligation (via the trust placed in you) to not say anything about it to anyone else. It is not your place to share because it’s not your information. There are, of course, exceptions. For example, if the person is planning to hurt themselves or others in any way, that’s a time to seriously consider breaching that trust. In fact, it’s the only time that I am aware of that a heath care provider can (and has the obligation to) breach patient confidentiality.
Everyone has their own secrets but not everyone can keep the secrets of others. How do you rate?
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In response to Weekly Prompts – Weekend Challenge.
I’m astonished at the level of coincidence surrounding this prompt. Just yesterday I posted about my fascination since childhood with the question “Why?”. Today, I see this prompt, and within it, a quote from Neitzsche that I literally just saw on Monday during my Trident Mindset lesson.
Why? Why am I seeing this quote for the second time in a week? Why is “why” following me around in real life instead of being trapped in the maze of thoughts in my mind? I ask why a lot, but this kind of recurrence from external sources is a bit much.
So many questions. Is it simple coincidence? Is it serendipity? Is it god or the universe giving me a metaphysical smack in the face because of my trend of posts about the possibility of life being random and not orchestrated? Is it kinda like when you are thinking of yellow cars, you see more yellow cars, but only because you notice it more not because you’re actually seeing more yellow cars than usual?
I don’t know. But I am tired. I’m quite sure my brain will continue to process this while I sleep, giving me more inspiration for tomorrow.
Good night!
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I have come to realize that people are nice for different reasons.
Some people are nice simply out of adherence to social convention.
Some people are nice because they are manipulating you; they need or want something from you.
Some people are nice because they are just a nice person, and may even be a bit naive.
Some people are nice because they have walked through hell and fought demons every single day at some point in their lives, and perhaps still do. All the while, the world goes on as usual, expecting normal things from people in very abnormal circumstances.
The problem lies in the fact that you never truly know which category a person falls into, and you may never know. This is why it is important to always be kind, but also important to protect yourself. This may mean saying no if you need to, establishing boundaries, and so on. This may also mean not taking advantage of someone’s niceness, because you may not want to find out what the other side of that person looks like.
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I’m probably gonna date myself here, but I don’t care.
I liked the yellow pages for finding companies. You could look up a category – lawyers, furniture, dentists, whatever – and get a listing of all the businesses of that type in your area. You know your area, so could tell by the town names how far away they are. Maybe you had a friend who used a particular company and told you they loved dealing with that company. Noted. Maybe a coworker had a horrible experience with a different company. Also noted. (Mental filing cabinets are your friends!!)
My point is, I don’t want some algorithm to show me only the results that it thinks I’d be interested in. I also don’t want another algorithm to bombard me with ads for shit I have no interest in just because I was curious about one thing on a random fucking Tuesday a few weeks ago. I don’t want to see sponsored listings for something only remotely related, or from companies that pay to subvert other companies by having their info at the top of the results list. I want to see ~all~ of my options, speak to a human being when I call, and make my own informed decision about who I’m going to give my business to. Just sayin.
That’s all, rant over. Carry on.
Happy Friday!
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You can read part 4 here.
Part 4 was a discussion of the scarier points of a random universe, but ended with a question about free will, which I’d like to get into now. To start, we will consult Merriam-Webster.
There are two ways to write this word — freewill and free will, the former being an adjective, the latter a noun. We are interested in the noun, so here we go:
Free will is making a choice on your own, but can that rule out randomness? Habits come to mind, which makes me think that yes, free will can rule out the idea that all choices are random.
But what about those choices not related to habit? And, to expand on that, how many of our choices are not related to habitual behavior? For example, if you are a frugal person, and see a dollar on the sidewalk, you’re likely to pick it up. If not, you may just walk on by. That choice to pick up the dollar or not, is related to a quality that you have – being frugal. And it creates certain habits, even if you did not consciously work to establish said habit. That leads to the conclusion that the type of person we are – frugal, a career person, an animal person, etc. – determines the types of habits we have and the choices we make. That, in turn, makes me think that all of our choices are related to habit, and if that is the case, not random.
Additionally, are there any random habits? The more I think about this, I think that any choice that we make is based on habit. But we can choose to forego habitual behavior. For example, I attended a baby shower today. I purchased non-practical gifts for said event. This was out of character for me, since I tend to err on the side of practicality when it comes to gifts for big events like birth or marriage.
Let’s take a moment to consult the dictionary again:
Habits are usual, regular, or recurring events or modes of behavior. Random is random – it could be any of the choices, with equal probability of each; the flip of a coin. Human beings are creatures of habit. If you have a particular value, such as honesty, or frugality, then your behaviors tend to reinforce that value. In other words, your choices reflect your values. Habits are value based. Can values be random? I lean towards no on this, because values have a purpose, and can have or cause a pattern.
A random thought, how do instincts fall into this? Instincts are predictable behaviors, but not one that a choice is made about.
This needs some additional thought before I continue. Prepare for part 6!
Have a great night!
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Beliefs are interesting things, because there is no fact behind them; there is no objective evidence. And yet, violence – wars, even – happen because of beliefs.
I saw an interesting clip on FB a while back, and there were two dudes talking, and the one said, “Don’t you know that belief is a doubt?” and the other dude says, “How is belief a doubt?” and the original dude says, “Because you cannot believe something and know it.” and he goes on to explain that “you can only believe in what you don’t know.” (here’s a link to the clip on Youtube) It was really intriguing, and certainly pertains to this discussion. If I know something – I know I woke up this morning, or that I had steak and shrimp for dinner last night, I don’t have to believe those things. They happened; I witnessed them. Or, as the dude in the video points out, I know my parents, I don’t believe in them. But, I’ve never met Santa Clause, so as a child, I had to believe in him. It’s a perspective I never considered.
On to more thinking, and brooding that it’s too cloudy to see the meteor shower.
Have a great night!
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Fun fact!!
Sometimes, a statement truly is just a statement. It’s not an attack or a judgement, it’s simply stating a fact.
For example, if I say, “You weren’t able to attend (insert event), so here’s what you missed…”, there is absolutely no reason to get defensive or explain yourself. If I wanted an explanation, I’d ask for one. If I was upset or mad that you weren’t there, I’d say so.
Just chill. Not everyone is out to get you!
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This is an interesting word.
You can get swag at a trade show, a bank, or even a doctor’s office. It’s merchandise that companies give you in the hopes that you use it and thereby promote their product or company. It’s pretty ingenious. Especially if they provide high quality swag! I still have a shirt I got from a physical therapy place years ago because it’s one of those thick, sturdy but super soft, comfortable shirts.
Random thought – band t-shirts are swag too, but you pay the band for the ability to advertise for them. Even more ingenious.
You can also give a swag – or, more appropriately, a SWAG – a Scientific Wild Ass Guess. This is where you have some data support, but not enough to say definitively, so you fill the rest with experience, judgement and luck. My favorite application of the word.
That is all. Happy Friday!
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I did a writing prompt a few days ago that asked what your favorite word is. Now, I have a question of my own…. what is your least favorite word?
I started thinking about it, and that’s a hard question. When I was younger, it was protein. I was writing a paper for a science class, and for whatever reason, didn’t have access to a dictionary at the time. I was visiting someone, I think. Anyway, I must have crumpled up and re-written that paper two or three times because every time I wrote the word “protein” it looked wrong. And this was back in the day when you actually had to write assignments on paper with a pen.
Nowadays, I don’t know. There are certain words that I don’t like hearing some people say, because they butcher the pronunciation. Like “supposedly”. Or “administrator”. But that’s the person screwing up the word for me, not the word itself – I don’t think that counts.
I think I can actually say that I do not have a least favorite word that I can think of.
A Peculiar Cerebral Tangle 