Tag: #bekind

The Yellow Pages

October 27th, 2023

I’m probably gonna date myself here, but I don’t care.

I liked the yellow pages for finding companies. You could look up a category – lawyers, furniture, dentists, whatever – and get a listing of all the businesses of that type in your area. You know your area, so could tell by the town names how far away they are. Maybe you had a friend who used a particular company and told you they loved dealing with that company. Noted. Maybe a coworker had a horrible experience with a different company. Also noted. (Mental filing cabinets are your friends!!)

My point is, I don’t want some algorithm to show me only the results that it thinks I’d be interested in. I also don’t want another algorithm to bombard me with ads for shit I have no interest in just because I was curious about one thing on a random fucking Tuesday a few weeks ago. I don’t want to see sponsored listings for something only remotely related, or from companies that pay to subvert other companies by having their info at the top of the results list. I want to see ~all~ of my options, speak to a human being when I call, and make my own informed decision about who I’m going to give my business to. Just sayin.

That’s all, rant over. Carry on.

Happy Friday!
The Point Continued (part 5)

October 14th, 2023

You can read part 4 here.

Part 4 was a discussion of the scarier points of a random universe, but ended with a question about free will, which I’d like to get into now. To start, we will consult Merriam-Webster.

There are two ways to write this word — freewill and free will, the former being an adjective, the latter a noun. We are interested in the noun, so here we go:

Free will is making a choice on your own, but can that rule out randomness? Habits come to mind, which makes me think that yes, free will can rule out the idea that all choices are random.

But what about those choices not related to habit? And, to expand on that, how many of our choices are not related to habitual behavior? For example, if you are a frugal person, and see a dollar on the sidewalk, you’re likely to pick it up. If not, you may just walk on by. That choice to pick up the dollar or not, is related to a quality that you have – being frugal. And it creates certain habits, even if you did not consciously work to establish said habit. That leads to the conclusion that the type of person we are – frugal, a career person, an animal person, etc. – determines the types of habits we have and the choices we make. That, in turn, makes me think that all of our choices are related to habit, and if that is the case, not random.

Additionally, are there any random habits? The more I think about this, I think that any choice that we make is based on habit. But we can choose to forego habitual behavior. For example, I attended a baby shower today. I purchased non-practical gifts for said event. This was out of character for me, since I tend to err on the side of practicality when it comes to gifts for big events like birth or marriage.

Let’s take a moment to consult the dictionary again:

Habits are usual, regular, or recurring events or modes of behavior. Random is random – it could be any of the choices, with equal probability of each; the flip of a coin. Human beings are creatures of habit. If you have a particular value, such as honesty, or frugality, then your behaviors tend to reinforce that value. In other words, your choices reflect your values. Habits are value based. Can values be random? I lean towards no on this, because values have a purpose, and can have or cause a pattern.

A random thought, how do instincts fall into this? Instincts are predictable behaviors, but not one that a choice is made about.

This needs some additional thought before I continue. Prepare for part 6!

Have a great night!
Beliefs

October 9th, 2023

Beliefs are interesting things, because there is no fact behind them; there is no objective evidence. And yet, violence – wars, even – happen because of beliefs.

I saw an interesting clip on FB a while back, and there were two dudes talking, and the one said, “Don’t you know that belief is a doubt?” and the other dude says, “How is belief a doubt?” and the original dude says, “Because you cannot believe something and know it.” and he goes on to explain that “you can only believe in what you don’t know.” (here’s a link to the clip on Youtube) It was really intriguing, and certainly pertains to this discussion. If I know something – I know I woke up this morning, or that I had steak and shrimp for dinner last night, I don’t have to believe those things. They happened; I witnessed them. Or, as the dude in the video points out, I know my parents, I don’t believe in them. But, I’ve never met Santa Clause, so as a child, I had to believe in him. It’s a perspective I never considered.

On to more thinking, and brooding that it’s too cloudy to see the meteor shower.

Have a great night!
Sometimes….

October 4th, 2023

Fun fact!!

Sometimes, a statement truly is just a statement. It’s not an attack or a judgement, it’s simply stating a fact.

For example, if I say, “You weren’t able to attend (insert event), so here’s what you missed…”, there is absolutely no reason to get defensive or explain yourself. If I wanted an explanation, I’d ask for one. If I was upset or mad that you weren’t there, I’d say so.

Just chill. Not everyone is out to get you!
Swag

September 22nd, 2023

This is an interesting word.

You can get swag at a trade show, a bank, or even a doctor’s office. It’s merchandise that companies give you in the hopes that you use it and thereby promote their product or company. It’s pretty ingenious. Especially if they provide high quality swag! I still have a shirt I got from a physical therapy place years ago because it’s one of those thick, sturdy but super soft, comfortable shirts.

Random thought – band t-shirts are swag too, but you pay the band for the ability to advertise for them. Even more ingenious.

You can also give a swag – or, more appropriately, a SWAG – a Scientific Wild Ass Guess. This is where you have some data support, but not enough to say definitively, so you fill the rest with experience, judgement and luck. My favorite application of the word.

That is all. Happy Friday!
Least favorite word

September 20th, 2023

I did a writing prompt a few days ago that asked what your favorite word is. Now, I have a question of my own…. what is your least favorite word?

I started thinking about it, and that’s a hard question. When I was younger, it was protein. I was writing a paper for a science class, and for whatever reason, didn’t have access to a dictionary at the time. I was visiting someone, I think. Anyway, I must have crumpled up and re-written that paper two or three times because every time I wrote the word “protein” it looked wrong. And this was back in the day when you actually had to write assignments on paper with a pen.

Nowadays, I don’t know. There are certain words that I don’t like hearing some people say, because they butcher the pronunciation. Like “supposedly”. Or “administrator”. But that’s the person screwing up the word for me, not the word itself – I don’t think that counts.

I think I can actually say that I do not have a least favorite word that I can think of.
Almost

September 18th, 2023

Something my dad told me a long time ago….

“ ‘Almost’ only counts in horseshoes, hand grenades and atom bombs.”

Simple statement, yet profound.

My dad told me this after I had been doing something, had not finished, and made the excuse that I almost finished but got tired of working on it, so I quit. He didn’t elaborate, just let me think about it. I wound up finishing whatever it was. I’ve since come to equate “almost” with “half-assed” for an abandoned project.

How many times have you accepted “almost” from others? Or, more importantly, from yourself?
Mutual suckiness

September 17th, 2023

I’m not the type of person to have tons of friends, I never have been. I have a small circle, and I like it that way.

My small circle and I have a problem. We all suck. We sometimes go months without hanging out or even talking, and every time we do talk, we say “I miss you! It’s been too long! We should hang out more!”. We muse about what we’re going to do “next time” and the fun we will have. Good times! Then, the moment passes, we part ways, and everyday life resumes her stranglehold. Weeks and months go by until we do it all over again. Vicious cycle.

I’d just like to point out that I’m saying that everyone sucks. Almost everyone is guilty of this with their friends, and maybe even with family. Too often, we let the everyday stuff get in the way of the truly important things. The connections that we have with people add so much more value to our lives than checking off to do list items.
Uninspired

September 15th, 2023

I read a thing recently – it was a quote from someone, but I don’t remember who. Either way. It was this:

“When you are consumed with thoughts, write. When you are uninspired, read.”

If you know who said that, please let me know. For now, ramblings continue.

What happens if you’re both? My mind is going a mile a minute – so many things and I can’t keep track of the jumping from thing to thing. Music. Writing. Work projects. Personal projects. Things that are a bit of both. Life. Philosophy. Statistics. Physics. And the connection between the last four things.

I need more tattoos. I need to finish designing the rest of my sleeve, tweak the design for my backpiece, and somehow come up with a few thousand bucks to get it all done.

holy shit. Just texting with a friend – multitasking can be evil, I know, but in this case, it’s great. The song Only came up, by NIN. I played it. Something strange happened, so I played it again to make sure. And then again. And again. (yes, I’m that person lol) I am smiling so big right now! This song used to represent to me a place where I wished I could be, but feared I would never get to. Somewhere where I could move on from the past, from myself, from random bullshit that was keeping me trapped in my own head with only this broken version of myself that longed to be something different, something more. Now, it seems like it’s talking about a place that is actually attainable, somewhere I’ve seen, almost. And that is… indescribably…. fucking…. Damnit, there are no words! Just imagine being presented with a situation where you would have more freedom than you’ve experienced in basically as long as you can remember, and how that would make you feel. That’s what this is.

I’m going to go listen to more music and bask in this awesome feeling for a while.
“Can’t” vs “Don’t”

September 14th, 2023

I actually misheard a song lyric a while back, but what I thought I heard actually sparked an interesting set of thoughts in my mind.

There is a distinct difference between saying that someone “can’t” do something and saying that they “don’t” do something.

If someone can’t do something, they lack the knowledge, ability, or skills to do so. For example, I can’t frame out a building. It’s a simple fact. I would have no clue how to do it properly.

If someone doesn’t do something, it may be that they are perfectly capable of whatever task or action; they simply choose not to. For example, I am capable of being a salesperson, but I made a choice not to do so as my profession.

I think more people need to realize and appreciate that in some (if not many) cases, a person is nice or good because they choose to be, not because they lack the ability to be mean or rude or even violent.

It’s an important fact to remember – you never truly know what someone might be capable of. Just because they don’t does ~not~ mean that they can’t.