Category: Random

Absurd Math Rant

October 30th, 2025

I take issue with how healthy weight is defined. And it’s not just cuz I’m a bigger girl. Let’s look at the numbers, shall we?

According to most of the charts that a google search popped up with, a woman of my height should weigh 114-144 lbs. i weigh more than that, of course.

But i have this spiffy body composition scale that gives you all sorts of info. Some important stats about me:

Fat free body weight – 115.8lbs

Muscle mass – 109lbs

Bone mass – 7lbs

Body water – 39.4% (low. Target range is 45-60%)

Now, i know that what follows is not exactly researcher grade mathematics, because muscle and bone contain water, so a fraction of that 39% is already accounted for. But ya know what, i’m going to assume it’s not. Because i can. (for the record, the ‘right’ results are even more ridiculous.)

If i were to have the same body water percentage, that puts me at 161lbs (=115.8*1.394 = 161.425). So even mildly dehydrated, i would still be overweight even if i had 0% body fat.

If i had 0% body fat and was “properly hydrated” at 45% body water, i would be at 167.9. My fat free body weight which doesn’t include any water makes it into this so-called ideal. The reality is, i would have to be both anorexic and severely dehydrated to fall within this completely fucking retarded yet wildly accepted ‘ideal range’.

Yes, i know the scale could be off with the bone mass and muscle mass and water percentage and all that. but being ‘off’ doesn’t explain away the fact that this is wrong on so many fucking levels.

Somebody make this make sense, please.

And still, somehow, we sit here wondering why people hate their bodies, and become obsessed with dieting. These charts are everywhere, and nobody bothers with the fine print of how it varies by individual, frame size, yadda yadda. Especially not kids, which is where it matters most.

How do we not see how fucked up this is?
Unstructured structure

October 26th, 2025

When it comes to getting things done on the daily, i am definitely not a type A, priority list making organizational freak that adheres to a strict task schedule.

Yes, i have my to-do list, but the order and manner of Completion is sometimes complete chaos. Everything will get done, but not necessarily in a logical fashion that would make sense to any other rational, reasonable adult.

The productivity is interspersed with canine conversations, random google search rabbit holes, the necessary DJ duties, and creative inspirations.

Like blog posts.

😉
Activities

October 26th, 2025

What is your favorite form of physical exercise?

This has certainly changed over the years, but currently? Walking.

Eventually, i want to be able to change that answer to “running”.

Got some work to do still. 😉
random realization

October 18th, 2025

ya ever see those comedy dance routines where the male partner acts like he’s in control and then the female partner takes over the lead, and they fight back and forth (big show of it) but they still execute everything perfectly and the dance is beautiful, if not hilarious?

i realized today that that is how my brain operates. it used to make me think i was crazy, but it’s actually a beautiful thing if I give in and just see what happens.
Evolutionarily speaking…

October 9th, 2025

Why is it that I am so retardedly energized and creative after nightfall and everyone else goes to bed?

It’s been that way my entire life. I know there are night owls and early risers in the world, that’s a known thing. But what purpose did being a night owl serve during our evolution? it had to have some value otherwise we’d all be Suzie Sunshine morning people by now.

So, what gives, Mother Nature? I am insanely curious to know the story behind this bizarre, almost instinctual behavior that I and others exhibit.
Challenge

October 8th, 2025

What was the hardest personal goal you’ve set for yourself?

To walk normally again and be able to retire my fucking cane – let it collect dust, lonely and unused in a dark corner of the house.
PSA

October 7th, 2025

If you find yourself picking out the single misspelling in something I rushed to do twenty minutes before you saw it, but still managed to do something that you don’t even know how to do, be grateful. Because if i were a petty, vindictive bitch, I would crush your ego like a bug and not think twice.
Pastimes

October 6th, 2025

What is your favorite hobby or pastime?

It’e not eating seeds… lol

Writing, thinking, or listening to music. Or, some combination thereof.
Waiting on Forgetting

October 5th, 2025

I want to apologize in advance to anyone who expected profound musings based on the title. This is not the post you’re looking for; this is funny and retarded and silly.

Ya know what it’s like running around doing things in the house or whatever and you just wrap up three of them back to back? How you sit down, resting for a minute while you wait for coffee to brew or water for tea to boil?

And then you remember.

‘I forgot to start the thing didn’t I?’

Listening for indications yields nothing, but you were really looking forward to that coffee, so you haul your tired ass up and go check.

Mother fucker.

You forgot.

Doesn’t that fucking suck?
A Knot in the Tangle – 10/4/25

October 4th, 2025

I just had a random thought, and it rendered my mind speechless. I literally just stared at what I wrote, my entire being just… humming.

‘You would never be in a toxic relationship with someone else if you didn’t have one with yourself first.’

Now that I see this incredibly simple fact, it is impossible to unsee. You know how in dramatic movies, when someone has a realization, there’s that moment? They start seeing all the puzzle pieces they missed in the situation in these crazy flashes. Everything comes rushing together and you see that epiphany in their face? Yeah, I just had one of those moments.

Think about anyone you know who has been in a toxic relationship. (and I don’t mean this in the buzzword sense. Just because you’re not compatible with someone doesn’t make them toxic. If you think it does, you need to have some sense beaten into you.) Seriously though, people in these toxic relationships (of any kind) who do end up leaving often times look inward in healthy ways – growing and healing as a result. Because they consciously mended the most important relationship of all… the one with themselves. The simplicity and utter fact behind this is fucking unreal. The reality of my own choices slapped me in the face and said, ‘yeah, how about *that*, dumbass?’

This got me thinking. Even in the most complicated situation, the simplest explanation is usually the answer. (Thanks, Occam!) What’s more complicated than humanity? I mean, seriously. We have the largest, most diverse ecosystem on the fucking planet. Literally. So…why does humanity always find itself in shitty situations? Is it possible that humanity is in a toxic relationship with itself? Can an entire species do collective shadow work? What would that even look like? What would the other side of that work look like? What would it *feel* like?

The possibilities here are insane. Could you imagine a world where people love themselves first and foremost? And how that would overflow to other people on the planet? And the strides we could make as a species if we stopped treating everything like a personal fucking attack? It sounds wonderful, in theory… almost perfect. And yet, just thinking about the eutopia-esque existence that such a feat could accomplish, makes my stomach turn and fills me with a sense of dread because it would be completely unbalanced, which defies the laws of the universe. Balance is necessary, it is essential. It is woven into existence…

Waves have peaks and troughs.

Particles have opposite counterparts – up quarks and down quarks, for example.

Even forces in the universe have balance! Magnetism has two poles. The strong force and the weak force.

There is balance in everything – it is a requirement of existence.

Hmm… new thought. Strong force vs weak force – the strong force keeps atoms intact, the weak force forces them apart. Electromagnetism is a self-sustaining duality. So… What is gravity’s counterpart?

Gravity is attractive, as a force. As a feeling, it’s somber and heavy and immovable, which is an interesting linguistic juxtaposition, but not the matter at hand. The laws of thermodynamics – entropy always increases. Gravity is the opposite of entropy, isn’t it? So, if we find the cause of entropy (or why it’s always increasing) then we’ll know the counterpart to gravity. But entropy is a measurement, so it can’t really have a ‘cause’….

there is something more to this. there can’t be negative gravity or negative entropy, it doesn’t make sense. there is something more basic about gravity, and about entropy. something we’re missing. the strong and weak force are a pair. electromagnetism is a whole made from two parts, and is essentially energy. the strong force is essentially subatomic gravity. the weak force is how subatomic entropy happens. what if… what if the four basic forces of the universe are not actually the four basic forces of the universe? What if it’s even simpler than that? Think about the epitome of gravity – a black hole. light cannot escape, but some energy does. what if energy and its counterpart (not sure what to call it) are the true basic forces of the universe?

What if duality is the essence of existence?